THE VOICE WITHIN

When it comes to supporting someone, listening is just as important as speaking

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For many of us, there may come a time when we need to speak up for a loved one. However to represent them properly it's every bit as important to pay attention to their true wants and needs. Author of Next Of Kin, Casey Beros, explains why striking this delicate balance is key to being a good advocate.

KNOW THEIR GOALS

Imagine going to a football match. The players enter the field, the crowd goes wild. The siren sounds and the ball starts flying around, players passing it deftly back and forth as they shift it from one end of the field towards the other. When they get there, you see them looking around, confused. You realise it's because there aren't any goalposts, so they don't know what they're aiming for or what constitutes a goal, much less a win. Not being clear on what you're advocating for is the equivalent but - depending on the situation - may have much higher stakes.

Being clear on your goal is vital, and the hardest part is that often the person we're advocating for:

may not know what they want may not be able to communicate what they want (physically or emotionally)

may change what they want over time

may know what they want in theory and then find out it's not actually what they want when faced with the reality

COMMUNICATION IS CRITICAL