PIGS IN BLANKETS LINING UP A DINNER COUP

Robert Cooper eyes grim prospects for turkeys, sprouts and betting shops

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As Bing Crosby would croon, 'It's Beginning to Look a Lot like Christmas' - yes, the 'festive season' as it's now known is here again, and although any turkey with an ounce of self preservation will be running for cover, there is more encouraging news for the dear old gobbler as the big day approaches. Sad to ponder how many turkeys miss out on Kempton's Boxing Day feast. According to a recent YouGov poll, 54per cent of us still prefer a few slices of turkey on our plates on Christmas Day. Many lengths away in second place came chicken (10per cent) with a vegetarian alternative (8per cent) sneaking into third, a mere parsnip ahead of beef (7per cent).

On the trimmings front, the clear-cut victor was roast potatoes (88per cent) with gravy (80per cent), stuffing (71per cent) and carrots (74per cent) filling the places. The decline of the cruelly despised Brussel Sprout (66per cent) persists whilst support for pigs in blankets (65per cent) is on the rise; they look a good bet to make the frame next year. I'm a founder member of the Protect the Sprout campaign.

In my days as potential city slicker, a career that foundered on the 1970s financial rocks, all employees of my firm could help themselves to an oven ready turkey. They were stored in a vacant office, varying in size from gigantic to humble. I was living at home at that juncture and there were many mouths to feed, so I won the popularity poll when I walked in with a good looking bird; so huge that I almost had to buy it a train ticket.