Generally speaking, I get my hair cut but once a year. I tell people it’s because the criminal cost of a trim these days would require me to flog a kidney, but the real story is that I find the experience almost unbearable.
There’s the part where you, a non-hairdresser, have to somehow muster the words to describe what you’d like, invoking an entire secret language – “oh, I was thinking of a semi-undercut with a French shag and a double-tuck, round-off, back-handspring? Maybe with some long layers at the back?” – or else stab mutely at a picture of Zendaya, as if the stylist had the power to transform you into the world’s hottest A-lister armed only with a pair of scissors and a big, rounded brush.
Then there’s the bit where you’re forced to sit staring at your own face in the mirror for at least an hour under unforgiving lighting, swathed in the least flattering item known to (wo)mankind: the black reverse hairdresser’s cape.
Oh, and the thing where you try to drink the nice coffee they’ve given you, only to discover that this jerks your head too much while someone wields a pair of sharp blades near your face – so you’re forced to keep perfectly still and take excruciating, tiny mouse sips.
この記事は The Independent の May 14, 2024 版に掲載されています。
7 日間の Magzter GOLD 無料トライアルを開始して、何千もの厳選されたプレミアム ストーリー、8,500 以上の雑誌や新聞にアクセスしてください。
すでに購読者です ? サインイン
この記事は The Independent の May 14, 2024 版に掲載されています。
7 日間の Magzter GOLD 無料トライアルを開始して、何千もの厳選されたプレミアム ストーリー、8,500 以上の雑誌や新聞にアクセスしてください。
すでに購読者です? サインイン
Taylor's less-than-Swift gigs will test the patience of fans
The star is giving Springsteen a Born-to-Run for his money as her three-hour show hits the UK
'They just don't make $6m indie-type films any more'
Director Richard Linklater talks to Patrick Smith about the fascination behind his film 'Hit Man', the 'reduction of the male', and why 'Dazed and Confused' wouldn't happen now
Why group holidays are not just for boozed-up teens
Olivia Petter recommends taking a trip away with friends as a thirtysomething... as long as you carve out some alone time
A game of two fly-halves
Bath and Northants will clash in Premiership decider today
Alcaraz slogs it out to beat Sinner in four-hour epic
Young Spaniard will meet Zverev in French Open final
How the new Steve Jobs used AI to amass $100bn
Jen-hsun Huang - founder and chief of Nvidia - has achieved god-like status with investors hanging on his every word and his company valued at $3 trillion,
Billionaire Issa brothers end their partnership with Asda
Union says deal with ‘asset stripping' equity firm is bad news
Modi sets out his mandate to form a new government
Narendra Modi was formally elected yesterday as the leader of the National Democratic Alliance (NDA) coalition, setting the stage for his third term as prime minister of India. While Mr Modi's Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) fell well short of the majority mark of 272 seats, winning only 240 seats in its own right, the NDA coalition together won 293 seats, some 61 ahead of the opposition INDIA alliance led by the Congress party.
Body count rises as Israeli tanks go deeper into Rafah
Israel has bombarded swathes of central and southern Gaza, while tanks have advanced to the western edges of the border city. In its latest update, the Israeli military said it had killed \"dozens\" of Hamas militants during operations in al-Bureij refugee camp and the nearby city of Deir al-Balah in central Gaza. Palestinian medics in the area reported that at least 15 civilians had been killed overnight in Israeli airstrikes.
EU voters close to Russia crave one thing above all
Mary Dejevsky travels to Finland, the Baltic states and Poland, where the issue of security is on everyone's mind