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I Dread Going Home Because My Brother Is a ManChild

Cosmopolitan US

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Issue 07, 2022

Old sibling rivalries die hard. Good thing our advice columnist, therapist Minaa B., is here to help you cope.

- MEREDITH SCHOMBURG

I Dread Going Home Because My Brother Is a ManChild

Dear Minaa,

I recently went home for my sister's birthday party, and I couldn't shake the feeling that my older brother still acts like a teenager and treats me like I'm still one too. (For the record, he's 27 and I'm 22.) Just one example: In the middle of the party, he put me in a headlock. He also called me by my childhood nickname the entire time.

No matter how much I avoid or ignore him, he's constantly trying to bring me down to his level with remarks like, "Do Mom and Dad know you're drinking?" (again, I'm 22) and "Still want me to turn the lights on in the basement before you go down there?"

He also leaves dirty dishes around the house for my mom to clean up, and when she asked him to help set up for my sister's party, he did the bare minimum, opting to spend most of the morning watching College GameDay from the living room couch.

Yet somehow, my parents don't seem fazed that he hasn't shed his frat-boy persona. He still lives rent-free at home and relies heavily on them for financial support. Meanwhile, although I'm the youngest child, I have a career, an apartment, and a life of my own. Yet...I'm still practically a baby in his eyes and it's starting to mess with how I see myself.

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