Let's hear it for the boys? We've heard quite enough already

We've all said things that didn't come out right, and it's my instinct - stand by for some counterintuition! - that Donald Trump's "quiet, piggy" admonishment of a female reporter on Air Force One last week was a very weird attempt at affection, or possibly, flirtation.

- Emma Brockes

As with everything the man does, the effect was disastrous and totally inappropriate. But rewatching the video, I saw from the president less an example of his usual bigotry and more an attempt at what looked like “OK, kiddo” cuteness that, catastrophically, and before I could nip it in the bud, had triggered a tiny sprig of sympathy.

It didn’t last two seconds, obviously. A few days after his piggy remarks, Trump sat in the Oval Office alongside the Middle East-based tyrant Mohammed bin Salman and sucked up to him for all he was worth. There was nothing affectionate in Trump’s response to Mary Bruce, the chief White House correspondent for ABC News and hero of the hour, when she asked the crown prince about the murder of Jamal Khashoggi - which, she suggested bravely, US intelligence agencies had concluded “you orchestrated” - informed the Saudi leader that “9/11 families are furious that you’re here in the Oval Office” and rounded off with: “Is it appropriate, Mr President, for your family to be doing business in Saudi Arabia while you're president?”

(According to Forbes magazine Trump’s extended family put through $50m in business deals connected to Saudi Arabia in 2024 alone.)

Trump’s explosive rage was well under way before she’d even finished speaking and the same thing struck me about his language as it always does: that the babyish register of calling someone a “terrible person and a terrible reporter” is more unnerving - more sinister in a booky wook Clockwork Orange kind of a way - than someone who speaks like a functioning adult.

Tuesday