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Madam De

The Free Press Journal - Mumbai

|

November 09, 2025

Sensuous, sacred and secured! That's Shobhaa De for you

- Shruti Pandit

I have always found Shobhaa De quite different from her public image. Most think she is haughty and unapproachable, with an unbearably high opinion of herself. And I think she is almost an introvert or 'reticent' as she prefers to call herself. People think she is frivolous because she wrote openly about sex and other taboo topics when it was considered to be a sacrilege to talk about them, forget writing a series of novels. Her being vociferous about everything under the Sun has been taken as her arrogance to think 'she knows everything'. I find her affectionate.

The best part she has never cared about what anyone thinks! To her, only what her immediate family thinks matters. "They are my censor board my husband and my children. If I were to preoccupy myself with what the rest of the world thinks about me, it would be draining me of energy and would serve no purpose whatsoever."

Did it, really, never bothered her trolls, critics?

"Never!" comes a prompt one.

"I am selective, not arrogant. Why should I bother about people who don't matter to me? I live life on my own terms. I decide who can enter my circle... who to call home... It's my decision who can have access to me. And that, probably, is the reason why people think I am unapproachable. And I am absolutely okay with it."

Not many know that De has read Sanskrit authors like Kalidasa, a few Upanishads, or that she loves listening to Indian classical music. I have seen her keep a poker face when people discuss scriptures in her presence, thinking she has not read them. "It's OK. I am not reading anything to impress the world. I am reading it for my own enrichment. I don't have to show off knowledge. I don't have to show my intellectual prowess by quoting from here and there. Only insecure people do that. I don't need to," she says.

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