Are there too many joggers in London?

Fitness nuts cavorting round our streets are trying to make the rest of us feel bad

- Maddy Mussen

Is there anything worse than seeing joggers (or “runners” as they like to call themselves) in London in January? It’s cold, dark and our thick layer of Christmas-induced blubber is refusing to drop off naturally like an iguana’s tail.

Everywhere you turn there are people pounding the streets wearing Salomon trainers, lurid colours, trail running vests and CamelBaks, as if they were tackling the Himalayas rather than dodging Lime bikes on a 0.1 per cent incline. It’s more than annoying. It’s confronting.

Are these people trying to make us feel bad? The answer is yes. No matter what anyone tells you about health, discipline or personal goals, the real reason for running is always smugness. But in 2025, it’s even worse. It’s like everyone secretly gathered around at midnight on New Year’s Eve 2024 and agreed: We’re gonna need a bigger gloat.

Ground zero for this triggering phenomenon must be Stoke Newington. Joggers as far as the eye can see. Sprinting along the pavements of the almost laughably flat Clissold Park with their decked-out running vests, preparing for their second Hackney Half (“Yeah got it under two hours last year, thanks mate, no really thanks. You could do it too if you really committed now”). It’s the running equivalent of carrying an energy gel on your walk to the shops.