Also, we regret to inform you that your children were exposed to lice at orientation. Consider the “getting sick at school” Band-Aid to be hereby ripped off! Fear not—we have lice checkers coming tomorrow, and we’ll make sure to let you know if your child is a carrier and thus not welcome back at school for a week.
Dear Parents,
Can you believe week one is already behind us? Apologies to everyone who wasn’t allowed to join owing to parasites, but if that’s you we have some good news. You weren’t exposed to COVID. This is a notification that everyone else was. Please make sure to monitor your child. Though the symptoms may be mild, the ramifications for your child-care situation will be earth-shattering.
Dear Parents,
We have a theory here at Kinder kids, and that theory is: Everyone is going to get pink eye eventually, so why not now? In other words, all your children now have pink eye. It looks sort of cool, though—like they’re all Shredder from the new “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”? We’ll try to get a pic and send it via the Brightwheel app.
Dear Parents,
Diese Geschichte stammt aus der November 20, 2023-Ausgabe von The New Yorker.
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Diese Geschichte stammt aus der November 20, 2023-Ausgabe von The New Yorker.
Starten Sie Ihre 7-tägige kostenlose Testversion von Magzter GOLD, um auf Tausende kuratierte Premium-Storys sowie über 8.000 Zeitschriften und Zeitungen zuzugreifen.
Bereits Abonnent? Anmelden
INSIDE JOB-"Hit Man"
Years before Hannah Arendt coined, in the pages of this magazine, the phrase \"the banality of evil,\" popular films and fiction were embodying that idea in the character of the hit man. In classic crime movies such as \"This Gun for Hire\" (1942) and \"Murder by Contract\" (1958), hit men figure much as Nazis do in political movies, as symbols of abstract evil.
WHATEVER YOU SAY
Rereading Jenny Holzer, at the Guggenheim.
SUBCONSCIOUSLY YOURS
Does every generation get the Freud it deserves?
BY A WHISKER
Louis Wain and the reinvention of the cat.
Beyond Imagining
Bessie, Lotte, Ruth, Farah, and Bridget, who had been lunching together for half a century, joined in later years by Ilka, Hope, and, occasionally, Lucinella, had agreed without the need for discussion that they were not going to pass, pass away, and under no circumstances on.
STATES OF PLAY
Can advocates use state supreme courts to preserve-and perhaps expand-constitutional rights?
THE LONG RIDE
The surf legend Jock Sutherland's unlikely life.
ARE WE DOOMED?
A course at the University of Chicago thinks it through.
GOD EXPLAINS THE RULES OF HIS NEW BOARD GAME
Guys, want to play this new board game? It’s called Life. No, it’s not “one of God’s impossible-to-understand games that take three hours to learn.” It’ll be fun, I promise!
RED LINE
With the election approaching, the U.S. and Mexico wrangle over border policy.
