Are you in a TOXIC relationship?
GLAMOUR South Africa|January/February 2020
It’s not always easy to spot the signs of emotional abuse, especially if you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, as the abuse is often subtle and progressive. Dr Sarah Davies, psychologist and author of Never Again: Moving On From Narcissistic Abuse and Other Toxic Relationships, sheds some light.
THOBEKA PHANYEKO
Are you in a TOXIC relationship?

The subtle signs of abuse

Abusive relationships, narcissistic abuse, in particular, can also be referred to as ‘invisible abuse’, as emotional and psychological abuse doesn’t leave physical marks. “In many ways, this makes it more dangerous, as it’s harder to spot,” says Dr Sarah Davies. If you suspect you’re being manipulated by your partner, look for subtle signs, including feeling undermined or unsupported. “Abusive relationships can be up and down, on and off, and leave you feeling drained, tired or emotionally exhausted. Feeling unsafe, threatened, or that your partner is unpredictable or unreliable, are all signs of a toxic relationship.” You may have started to second-guess yourself and wonder if you’re imagining things. You may miss the warning signs if your abuser showers you with romance, gifts, compliments, apologies and promises to overcompensate. Your head is probably spinning with a whirlwind of emotions. “But it’s important to stay grounded while you try to keep up with what’s happening,” she says. “Be realistic about how you’re being treated.”

Healthy vs. toxic relationships

When you’re in a healthy relationship, you feel supported, and your partner is willing to accept you, baggage and all. A toxic relationship is the opposite of this. “Other signs of an abusive relationship include having a partner who suggests that any issues or problems within the relationship are your fault,” says Dr Davies. The truth is, it’s never solely down to you because relationships take two people. “Watch out for abusive behaviours, such as criticism, noshows, guilt-tripping, shaming, manipulation and lies, usually followed by a show of love and remorse.”

Are you being gaslighted?

Diese Geschichte stammt aus der January/February 2020-Ausgabe von GLAMOUR South Africa.

Starten Sie Ihre 7-tägige kostenlose Testversion von Magzter GOLD, um auf Tausende kuratierte Premium-Storys sowie über 8.000 Zeitschriften und Zeitungen zuzugreifen.

Diese Geschichte stammt aus der January/February 2020-Ausgabe von GLAMOUR South Africa.

Starten Sie Ihre 7-tägige kostenlose Testversion von Magzter GOLD, um auf Tausende kuratierte Premium-Storys sowie über 8.000 Zeitschriften und Zeitungen zuzugreifen.

WEITERE ARTIKEL AUS GLAMOUR SOUTH AFRICAAlle anzeigen
Are you considering moving to UK?
GLAMOUR South Africa

Are you considering moving to UK?

Bestselling author, Sam Beckbessinger is also a seasoned mover, and her latest offering, Moving to the UK, offers helpful tips, funny anecdotes and to-do lists to help you navigate this transition.

time-read
5 Minuten  |
December 2023 - January 2024
A beauty solution
GLAMOUR South Africa

A beauty solution

At Standard Beauty, they take pride in being an all-women-run team, bringing diverse perspectives and unparalleled expertise to the skincare industry.

time-read
1 min  |
December 2023 - January 2024
3 Things to Do When You Overthink Everything
GLAMOUR South Africa

3 Things to Do When You Overthink Everything

How to overcome analysis paralysis.

time-read
5 Minuten  |
December 2023 - January 2024
A la MODE
GLAMOUR South Africa

A la MODE

With bold looks and exceptional value for money, the new Omoda C5 has made a big splash in the local motoring scene.

time-read
1 min  |
December 2023 - January 2024
Spotlighting ABANTU FOR THE PEOPLE
GLAMOUR South Africa

Spotlighting ABANTU FOR THE PEOPLE

Small businesses play an important role in the South African economy, and we're playing our part by showing them some love. This month, we shine the spotlight on Abantu Media, cofounded by Jay Wabantu who is also a tattoo artist and photographer.

time-read
1 min  |
December 2023 - January 2024
CELEBRATING EMPOWERMENT
GLAMOUR South Africa

CELEBRATING EMPOWERMENT

Pan-African bank Absa partners with Glamour for their influential Women of the Year Awards 2023

time-read
1 min  |
December 2023 - January 2024
TAX SEASON UNPACKED
GLAMOUR South Africa

TAX SEASON UNPACKED

The word 'tax' stirs up many emotions, so we've roped in Tax Specialist, Natasha Lorde to answer your questions and help get you ready for Tax Season.

time-read
4 Minuten  |
December 2023 - January 2024
It's a COMPARISON trap
GLAMOUR South Africa

It's a COMPARISON trap

Even picture-perfect couples go through rough patches. Here's how to avoid the social media comparison trap.

time-read
4 Minuten  |
December 2023 - January 2024
Embracing CHANGE
GLAMOUR South Africa

Embracing CHANGE

It's time to stop comparing your current body to your former one. Romanticising the past is easy, but we're not meant to look the same our whole lives.

time-read
9 Minuten  |
December 2023 - January 2024
Healing YOUR INNER CHILD
GLAMOUR South Africa

Healing YOUR INNER CHILD

The journey of self-discovery is nuanced and you may have discovered a younger you that needs to be seen and heard. Certified Meditation Practitioner, Melissa Lainn, shares her approach to healing the inner child.

time-read
3 Minuten  |
December 2023 - January 2024