Paddling pool search is my queue to leave
Daily Record|June 6, 2020
Conga lines all over and day ends in doghouse
Michael Gannon
Paddling pool search is my queue to leave

THE boffins now spend their days compiling nice wee graphs that show us just how much of a dug’s dinner the UK has made of the coronavirus.

But not so long ago, the clever folk used to find other ways to crunch numbers when they got a bit bored. Some worked out us Brits spend about 47 days of our lives standing in queues – and that was way before lockdown.

We can probably chuck a few more weeks on now after this carry on. Our lives are now spent in the house, out for walks, or standing in blooming long lines.

Getting into Tesco is like waiting in line for one of the rides at Alton Towers but the only sense of excitement you get at the end is if there’s a yellow sale sticker on the Empire biscuits.

British people love a queue, they’ve always said. I thought it was a bit of a myth but not any longer. These folk must love it.

Everywhere you go there’s a massive conga of people – or cars if it’s the McDonald’s Drive Thru.

This story is from the June 6, 2020 edition of Daily Record.

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This story is from the June 6, 2020 edition of Daily Record.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 8,500+ magazines and newspapers.