The “I Do” Redo

Upscale Magazine|June 2020

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The “I Do” Redo
Three practical ways to salvage the BIG DAY.
By E. Monique Johnson

You’ve dreamed of this day since he got down on one knee, slid that rock onto your finger, and you shouted, “Yes!” It can be difficult to change your mind when so much of your heart and soul has been invested in an event that celebrates the union of you and the love of your life. The first thing to remember is to be gentle with yourself and know that it is absolutely okay to grieve the change in plans.

“Yes, there are bigger things going on in the world right now and to some, being alive and in good health to even be able to reschedule should be your priority,” says one relationship expert. “But that doesn’t mean that your feelings are any less valid. You have every right to feel disappointment and grief over changed and canceled events.” In true healing fashion, they recommend allowing yourself to cycle through the processing of those feelings so that you will be able to move on with a renewed sense of purpose and positivity. “You have to acknowledge what you’re feeling to be able to navigate it, and no one can dictate your feelings for you.” Speaking to a professional therapist or even a marriage counselor may be a great solution. Even just discussing your feelings openly and honestly with your partner, family, and friends can be cathartic and help you receive the closure you need to move forward.

Once you have processed the emotions surrounding your wedding day, you’ll have to make a tough choice: When it comes to moving forward with your wedding, you’re going to have to decide whether you will say “I do” to a later date, to some minor changes or to a completely reformed concept of your original plans.

Postpone It

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June 2020