ABOVE THE LAW!

Explosive court papers dish Scientology warred on lawmen to protect Masterson rape secrets

NEW WALLOP FOR WILD MAN WALLEN!

More rehab & Worse after latest boozy bust

BIRD FLU PANDEMIC: THE DANGER IS REAL!

A MENACING new strain of bird flu has infected a man in Texas, sparking fears the virus is FAR deadlier than COVID-19 and America's being ravaged by a secret pandemic!

NORTH WEST'S $30K PAYDAY!

Wiseass kid follows Kim & Kanye's lead

SHILOH'S TRICKY PARTY FAVOR!

Won't blow out candles until Brad & Angie kiss and make up

MARGOT FUMES AS SHAKIRA TOYS WITH BARBIE!

DOLLFACE Margot Robbie is normally mild-mannered, but Shakira's Barbie zingers are getting under her skin and spies say she's telling people to keep the witch away from her - or else!

VAIN MARIAH OUT TO PUMP UP HER SHRINKING MELONS!

CHESTY songbird Mariah Carey is in total meltdown mode as her once-prized 34F breasts have shriveled in size and are sinking toward her navel, say sources.

BRIT BEGS SAM TO SAVE HER!

Sends coded messages to get under his skin

LAUER & LEMON'S REVENGE FANTASY!

Toxic team aims to conquer world

JUNKIE SON TRASHING 'UNFIT' CHER

Tells court she can't manage her own life!

OSTEOARTHRITIS CURE IS NEAR!

A CURE for osteoarthritis, which causes painful, stiff joints, may be widely available in just five years!

ODD FATHER SAJAK SCARES HIS DAUGHTER

Keeping him away from new squeeze

CATWOMAN MICHELLE SINKS HER CLAWS INTO YELLOWSTONE!

CRANKY Kevin Costner and meandering Matthew McConaughey are both jockeying for position to be the overlord of Yellowstone, but there's growing talk Michelle Pfeiffer will knock them both off their pedestals and become the franchise's undisputed cowboy queen leaving the high-profile guys playing second fiddle!

WHY TORI SPELLING CAN'T POOP ALONE!

DEAR DR. GILDA: What's the straight poop on Tori Spelling? The D-list actress says she can't go to the bathroom without someone watching her - is this normal?

DOMESTIC DIVA DUST-UP

PRIM and proper Martha Stewart is publicly saying polite things about the Duchess of Sussex's latest lifestyle company.

WOLVERINE HUGH'S MUTANT MELTDOWN

Friends fear divorce sent him over edge

GIRL, 7, SELLS LEMONADE TO BUY MOM'S GRAVE MARKER

Raises $10G after tragedy

KEANU PUTTING A RING ON IT!

Ready for simple wedding without 4 S400M prenup

Jen & Sandy SHOP FOR NEW LOOK!

Lovelorn pals in dual quest for fountain of youth

BETTE'S REALITY REBOOT!

Hopes Housewives Will be the wind heneath her wings

LIZZO ON THE LAM!

Thin-skinned crybaby too soft for showbiz

PICKED APART!

Fans lobhy to dump Robbie bring ack Frank

LAW & ORDER STAR'S DOG SHOT DEAD!

Delivery driver suspended after Harmon tragedy

MALCOLM IN A MUDDLE!

Frankie regrets price of TV fame

JELLY ROLL'S NEW DRUG NIGHTMARE!

Teel faughter wasn't soler for entire summer

SCREAM COPYCAT'S CHAINSAW MASSACRE

Busted for hloodhath mirroring horror movie

TAYLOR'S BITCHY BFFs BLAKE & SELENA IN LINE FOR SWIFT KICK!

GLOBAL phenom Taylor Swift is caught in the middle of a bitter feud between her two besties, Blake Lively and Selena Gomez, and she may be forced to give one of them the boot, say sources.

KING CHARLES STRICKEN WITH BELL'S PALSY!

Facial paralysis makes it hard to sneak forces him to lie low

BALONEY!

Judge Judy on warpath to save Menendez bros

DISEASE STEALS CHRISTINA LEGS!

Can't stand & living in pain