Life After losing a child
Bona|June 2020
A parent’s worst fear is the death of a child. And, when that fear becomes a reality, grief becomes unbearable and acceptance seems impossible. Four readers share intimate details of their journeys.
Amanda Mtuli & Fundiswa Nkwanyana
Life After losing a child

Zaza Letsholo (37) lost her 4-year-old son, Kamo, 3 years ago. She is a sales executive for a car manufacturer and founder of Zaza Mahlangu Foundation, residing in Pretoria.

THE TRAGIC LOSS

In 2017, while at home with my family, we noticed that we hadn’t seen Kamo in a while. I went outside to look for him and found him at the bottom of the pool with his bicycle. I jumped in, pulled him out and rushed to the hospital where the medical staff attended to him. After a while, we were told that he was dead. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw my son’s lifeless body; I thought I was having a bad dream. I have never felt so much pain in my life. My family and friends had to keep me sedated for a couple of days because I couldn’t stop crying.

THE GRIEVING PROCESS

Every inch of my body was in excruciating pain and seeing everyone crying in my house broke my heart even more. Not a day goes by where I don’t think about him. The week before he died, we were preparing for his birthday celebration – we buried him on his birthday. There were times when I was angry that my son was dead, but I’m starting to accept it now, even though I sometimes think that I’m going to wake up from a bad dream. I’m still grieving and crying about it, but it gets better each day.

ACCEPTANCE

This story is from the June 2020 edition of Bona.

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This story is from the June 2020 edition of Bona.

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