When people first heard the news, they would ask one of two questions: how long were you together, and why did it end? The first answer was easy - 22 years. But the second was much, much harder. Because honest answers about long relationships can take a while.
We met at work, in the late 1990s. A basement office with hardly any light, and just two weeks to get to know each other before he moved away to start a new job. I had never dreamt of white weddings and finger food before, but I knew - as crazy as it may sound - that, one day, we would get married. And we did. Now that it is over, it's easy to forget those early days of nicknames and picnics and colleagues commenting on our never-ending public displays of affection. We were a pair of smug marrieds. And then, gradually, very gradually, we weren't.
Some relationships are broken by infidelity. Some by lies or abuse. Ours was more of a humdrum ending, quietly ground down by the day-to-day. We had moved abroad and back, lost three pregnancies, had a child. Renovated a home, nicely. But the drift had set in. And by the time we realised how bad it had become, it had run away from us completely. I had stopped appreciating him, and he barely noticed me at all. We had become two people united in our unhappiness, and after six months of counselling, agreed that our relationship had run its course. It felt like the biggest of failures - both for our 10-year-old daughter, and for the hopeful pair we once were. I was absolutely petrified about what my life would be like, newly single and nearing 50, but in the three years since our split, it has been gently transformed. Yes, it has been hard. The truth is, separation - whether you chose it or your ex chose it for you - can be stressful and lonely, and can change practically every aspect of your life. But it can also be the start of something very good, and completely unexpected.
هذه القصة مأخوذة من طبعة March 2024 من Woman & Home UK.
ابدأ النسخة التجريبية المجانية من Magzter GOLD لمدة 7 أيام للوصول إلى آلاف القصص المتميزة المنسقة وأكثر من 8500 مجلة وصحيفة.
بالفعل مشترك ? تسجيل الدخول
هذه القصة مأخوذة من طبعة March 2024 من Woman & Home UK.
ابدأ النسخة التجريبية المجانية من Magzter GOLD لمدة 7 أيام للوصول إلى آلاف القصص المتميزة المنسقة وأكثر من 8500 مجلة وصحيفة.
بالفعل مشترك? تسجيل الدخول
Welcome to ENGLISH WINE COUNTRY
Ellen Himelfarb discovers palate-tingling wines and warm hospitality among the sunlit slopes and flint villages of Sussex
Naturally STYLISH
Combining mindfulness ideas and natural materials, this country house - built by Lisa and David Wallace – exudes beauty, calm and serenity
Make ANXIETY Your superpower
Embracing worrying thoughts might be more beneficial than suppressing them, says Samantha Wood
I hope the kids have my self-confidence
Author and presenter Richard Madeley reflects on the early days of parenting, and watching his family grow
Love..OR LIES?
Romance fraud is, sadly, on the increase - meet two women affected and find out how to stay safe
WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE A...PROBATION OFFICER
Meet Sarah Port, 40, deputy head of the Probation Delivery Unit in North Essex
Could YOU live on your PENSION?
Surviving on the minimum retirement living standard for a week shocked Faith Archer into increasing her contributions
We're having a FASHION moment
And long may it continue, says Wendy Rigg, charting the rise of midlife fashion
There really is NO PLACE LIKE HOME
But when Yorkshire-woman Sharon Wright fetched up in Surbiton, which would hold that special place in her affections?
Older & bolder
One of our favourite comedians, Helen Lederer, has finally sent imposter syndrome to Room 101