In this issue

Candice Swanepoel She Looks Good
Candice Swanepoel is skinny enough and rich enough and relevant enough because of who her agents are, which really has nothing to do with her, and more to do with her agents being some fucking pervert who was into tranny looking women like UMA THURMAN, who at the time of his creampie that dripped down her leg and soaked her panties, while inseminating her egg, a solid way to prove that her reproductive organs didn’t match her manly hands, and I know I’m probably not being fully fair to UMA THURMAN who is more than just man hands, it’s just that whenever I see her in anything, I only see man hands…

So Whether Josephine Skriver Was Skinny Or Not
She’d still be relevant since that is how modeling works, and it must be fun knowing that you’ll always just be in your parents shadow, seen as someone who only gets work because of nepotism because she’s too damn lazy to try to do things that would give her some sort of legacy of her own, because she’s obviously the kind of celebrity kid who thinks she’s important enough just for being a celebrity kid, so she’s got the confidence to get out there despite her not so hot face….but she’s got tits so faces are irrelevant and a matter of opinion because what I find ugly, you may find hot as fuck and that’s reasonable…there are white trash broke ass losers who think going to VEGAS for the week is the end all, be all of life…like it can’t get any better, while this broke ass loser thinks VEGAS is trash…so you get what I am saying here…we are all different and Maya Hawkes face isn’t an exception because that shit is different as fuck.

Sara Sampaio Stop Hyping Yourself Up
I am so tired of the media making a big deal out of these people, in what I assume is to help them stay motivated or give them the confidence to do nude pics on the internet while being heroes, since heroes can do no wrong, and heroes can’t get fired for being pornographers in the breakroom….

Fruits Basket US Magazine Description:

Fruits Basket Magazine, the world's new leading men's magazine, gives guys what they want — beautiful women, jokes, sports, entertainment, gadgets, rides and beautiful women. Did we mention beautiful women?