In The Name Of (Self) Love

There are many ways to treat yourself well and look after your needs, whether they’re mental, emotional or physical. Two Her World editors share how they went about it – and the unexpected outcomes

- Goh Yee Huay

Ever since the onset of the pandemic, there’s been lots of talk about the importance of “self-love” – in everyday conversations, in the media, on social media, and advertisements for all kinds of products that promise to deliver feel-good fuzzies. But what exactly does the term mean?

According to the American Psychological Association, self-love is defined as “regard for and interest in one’s own being and contentment”. In an article on the website Psychology Today, clinical psychologist Dr Deborah Khoshaba calls it “a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth”.

Sounds terribly broad and sweeping? That’s because it is. Just like love, self-love can take countless forms and be expressed in myriad ways. It can mean setting aside time to meditate, enjoying a pick-me-up facial, or hogging the bathroom for a long-drawn DIY spa session. Some may feel it’s a mental thing, and practise self-love through positive mantras, self-affirmation and learning to love who they are – literal and figurative blemishes and all. And yet others nourish themselves with healthy, wholesome activities, such as feel-good exercises, eating well or enjoying kick-ass sex with a loving partner (the knock-on benefits of this on a person’s appearance and mood are pretty well-known).

The bottom line is that self-love isn’t just for emo folk, or an indulgence among followers of New Age fads. It’s the essential process of staying touch with your needs, your emotions and your sense of well-being. There’s no right or wrong way to go about it either – you do what you need to feel good about yourself, so long as it doesn’t jeopardise your mental or physical health, relationships or bank account.