IN 1911, A GUY NAMED J. K. DANIELS sculpted a cow out of butter and sent it along to the annual Iowa State Fair. To this day, about 600 pounds of butter is spread upon a wood-and-metal frame in a refrigeration unit kept at a steady 40 degrees. After the fair, they turn up the heat, and when the butter is soft enough to be removed, they collect it in five-gallon buckets and use it again the following year. The butter cow is eternal.
Over time, the cow was joined by a cast of supporting butter sculptures. Down through the years, these have included a Butter American Gothic, a Butter Abraham Lincoln, and a Butter Starship Enterprise. In 1999, the fair featured a Butter Last Supper. But it is the Butter Cow that has the dark powers. Everybody agrees. In their hubris, the Democrats risk the eternal wrath of the Butter Cow.
Every four years, it has become customary for presidential candidates of both parties to attend the Iowa State Fair as part of their campaign to win and/or survive the lowa caucuses, a nominating mechanism so preposterously arcane that even when it awarded the win to Pete Buttigieg in 2020, a considerable chunk of the population didn't believe it. In 2012, Mitt Romney was the unofficial winner for two weeks, until the state party reversed itself and gave the victory to Rick Santorum. It can be said that there never has been a real winner to this day.
At the fair, they stand behind a bunch of hay bales outside the pavilion in which the Butter Cow is kept, and they talk to a crowd of beer-drinking farmers and sunburnt children and a huge, unruly scrum of reporters and camera crews.
Diese Geschichte stammt aus der September 2023-Ausgabe von Esquire US.
Starten Sie Ihre 7-tägige kostenlose Testversion von Magzter GOLD, um auf Tausende kuratierte Premium-Storys sowie über 8.000 Zeitschriften und Zeitungen zuzugreifen.
Bereits Abonnent ? Anmelden
Diese Geschichte stammt aus der September 2023-Ausgabe von Esquire US.
Starten Sie Ihre 7-tägige kostenlose Testversion von Magzter GOLD, um auf Tausende kuratierte Premium-Storys sowie über 8.000 Zeitschriften und Zeitungen zuzugreifen.
Bereits Abonnent? Anmelden
ALOHA
Unless you're Pharrell Williams. Hawaii and Hong Kong may seem far removed from each other-culturally and geographically-but Pharrell doesn't see it that way.
Canali Chills Out
The iconic Italian brand may be known for tailoring, but its effortlessly casual clothes are a welcome evolution
I Am a Wellness Asshole Now
The only thing more excruciating than soaking in a tub of freezing-cold water is telling people it actually works.
ON DECK
A preppy staple and occasional punchline), the boat shoe is ready for its latest turn in the spotlight
UP,UP,AND AWAY
Breitling’s weird, wild, and wonderful new watch is inspired by a 1999 balloon journey around the world
the man who broke breaking
Breaking (aka breakdancing) is making its Olympic debut in Paris this summer. Victor Montalvo, the top American competitor, is fighting for not only a GOLD MEDAL but also the SURVIVAL of the sport.
THE RAP-MUSIC PARADOX
I love, revere, and respect women. So how can I listen to music that demeans them?
HOW I THREW MY FIRST PUNCH
After a lifetime of running from confrontation, I took up boxing at age 40. In the ring, I finally discovered what it was like to deliver a blow and to take a few on the chin myself.
THE SECOND COMING OF THE POLITICAL CONVENTION
For the first time in decades, at both the Republican and Democratic national conventions this summer, we're at risk of honest-to-God politics breaking out
the BEST BARS in AMERICA 2024
SOMETIMES YOU JUST WANT TO SETTLE IN.